The Simple Manifesto #6 – Learn to say no
This is part of our series on The Simple Living Manifesto. We invite you to join us on the journey.
The sixth idea in the manifesto is:
Learn to say no. This is actually one of the key habits for those trying to simplify their lives. If you can’t say no, you will take on too much. Article here.
When I read Leo’s book, this was one area I found myself struggling with (as I wrote here).
But Leo offers a few additional pointers elsewhere:
- Say “Yes” first
You say “yes” to the request (assuming you want to do it but don’t have the time to do it now), and then do one of two things: 1) you say “Sure, but I am swamped right now — can you get back to me on this in a month or so? I don’t want to commit to it unless I can actually do a great job on it.” or 2) you say “Sure, but can you do x, y and z first, so we can analyze if this is going to work before we set it into action?” - Know your commitments.
- Value your time.
- Defer.
- Be polite, but firm.
- Pre-empt.
- “I’d love to, but”.
- Never say you’re sorry.
These can come easy to me in some situations but not so easy in others. It’s hard for me to say no to family and close friends or when the tasks are related to my 4 or 5 most important things.
The biggest problem I have is when saying “yes” in one area causes me to say “no” in another. I want to do it all. I need to do a much better job of finding those balances and deferring tasks.
Would love to get your advice on how you’re learning to say “no.”
BTW – Don’t forget to read all the good stuff Steve Burleson is writing on this theme. He’s a number of days ahead of us.
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